


Mushroom samba

by Yandere_Shoujo



Series: FFXV Dreamwidth Prompts [17]
Category: Final Fantasy XV
Genre: Chocobros off their rockers, Gen, Unintentional shrooms, bad trip bro
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-26
Updated: 2017-04-26
Packaged: 2018-10-24 03:18:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,309
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10733046
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Yandere_Shoujo/pseuds/Yandere_Shoujo
Summary: Someone picks the wrong mushrooms and the entire party trips hard. To be fair, their dinner was still delicious.





	Mushroom samba

**Author's Note:**

> DRUGS DRUGS DRUGS  
> WHICH ARE GOOD? WHICH ARE BAD?

Two days of hunting in the Vesperpool area had gone by. There was still time before departure to Altissia and they needed the money to prepare. New gear, curatives stocked, and finally they could rest at a caravan.

During their time out, Ignis had come up with a new recipe. Cockatrice stew with a side of mushrooms. Ignis and Gladio got the bird, Prompto and Noctis handled the vegetation. Much to Noctis’ dismay.

The remains of the cockatrice simmered in a large pot and not even King’s Quest could keep the party from being distracted by the smell.

Tomatoes, basil, a hint of green peppers and a blend of spices hit their noses from the open caravan window. Ignis barely had time to set their plates down before their dug in.

Their meal passed like many others; full of chatter, compliments to the chef, and banter.

White plastic creaked under Gladio’s weight when he leaned back, body limp from satisfaction.

“Damn. Next time we gotta have cockatrice with Cup Noodles™. That was amazing.”

“Yeah, let’s cook more of the stuff we kill.” Prompto agreed from the table his head was now resting on.

Noctis didn’t reply, having fell asleep at some point after finishing his own platter.

Ignis trailed his tongue over an upper wisdom tooth, savoring the last of the broth.

“I shall absolutely keep it in mind. Now, let us be off to bed.”

Everyone stretched and stood, Ignis gently rousing Noctis from his slumber and gestured with a wave of his palm to the caravan. Wordlessly, they retreated inside.

* * *

The grocery clerk stood straight from his slumped position over the counter.

Was that just a scream?

A couple renting chocobos chatted outside and rode their birds into the night. The clerk shrugged and turned on the radio. Said couple stopped when they could have sworn the caravan just shook. Shrugging, they rode away.

* * *

Prompto lay wide eyed on the floor of the caravan, having fallen from the third tier bunk. It was dark, but the darkness was moving.

The darkness was moving.

He started breathing heavily then.

Why was the darkness moving?

“Guys…” he whispered, voice trembling.

In what little light he could see with, he spotted Noctis fidgeting in his sleep. Fidgeting a lot.

Flecks of crystals sparkled around him in his thrashing fit and Prompto was really getting freaked out.

“Uh uh. Nightmare! I’m in a nightmare. This is bad. Oh. Nope. Nope. Ah-ah, nope.”

Gladio shot up from the lowest tier bunk, smacked his head on the wood above him, and rolled on top of Prompto in pain. The blonde yelped.

“Sweet Shiva no! Don’t let the darkness eat me!”

Scrambling off of Prompto, Gladio backed away on the ground until hitting a dead end of the shower stall. Head whipping in eight different directions, he blinked rapidly. The world was doing abstract things to his eyes and he didn’t understand why, nor did he like it. Confused grunts like half sneezes escaped him every time a particular corner of his eye warped out of shape or rippled.

The commotion awoke Ignis who felt suddenly extremely hot. Hotter than being in Lestallum. He groaned, feeling the immediate need to remove his jacket.

“Gods.” He grumbled. “Why is it sweltering in here?”

The caravan was dark, and he didn’t see any surprise lava pits anywhere. Perhaps he should remove his shirt too.

And his undershirt.

And his trousers.

Groaning, Ignis lay in his boxers and froze when seeing the wallpaper of the caravan. The slightly peeling wallpaper was melting off. Each hairline fracture seemed to curl and fall, replaced immediately to its former state and repeat. Even with his glasses off, it looked so clear. The side bed he lay on was drenched with sweat, making him feel like he was resting in a lake.

But the melting wall paper.

“Ngh. Chh. Psshh!” Noctis’ eyes were clenched as his thrashing escalated to his legs. Half formed weapons appeared and disappeared in bright flashes. This worsened Prompto’s living nightmare world as the flashes illuminated shadows he hadn’t seen before.

“No-no-no-nonono!” Prompto scrambled to his feet as much as he could in the tiny space and ran towards the first beacon of safety he could find, Gladio.

“Dude- the shadows! They’re trying to eat me! I think! But they keep trying to touch me!”

There was no response as he “Tch”-ed at the twitching corners of his eyes.

A shadow appeared to want to wrap itself around Prompto’s waist and he screamed, applying himself to Gladio’s waist instead.

“Pleaaaase don’t let them get me!”

The tips of Prompto’s spikes set off a blast of sensory input to Gladio’s eyes and he could not look away. Blonde triangles rippled and curled, turning from zig zag to straight lines. Each sharp corner was outlined with a gradient of rainbow color. Prompto received no response to his cries as Gladio was struck speechless.

Noctis’ eyes flew open.

He breathed in and out for several seconds, unaware of the chaos around him, and laughed.

The sharp pitch caused Ignis’ head to snap in his direction.

“Gods…” he whispered.

Every mole, crease, and pore on the Prince’s face was so clear.

Tears of mirth fell from Noctis’ eyes. Doubling over from his middle bunk, he clenched his sides and sniggered. When he couldn’t contain it any longer, his head flew back.

“Aaaahh the shadows are laughing at me!” Prompto cried.

Wide amber eyes zipped around at the crinkling reality that was Gladio’s vision. He was much too freaked out to speak.

From the outside of the caravan, late night travelers spared the thing a second glance when they could have sworn they heard a yell, insane laughter, or a thump- but chose to ignore it. Maybe someone fell from there bed after some goofy prank.

* * *

Early morning crawled across the sky and the residents of the caravan rose from their different states of stupor. Gladio was first, somehow winding up completely hunched up in the tiny closet space. He worried he’d break the door frame when exiting the thing. Ignis was next, towel wrapped around his lower half and utterly lost as to how he wound up in the shower.

Noctis scraped himself from the caravan floor, and had to dislodge his finger from Prompto’s mouth, cringing at the bite marks. This caused Prompto to sit up in a hurry, become woozy, and lean against the sink cabinet.

“What… the hell.” Noctis blinked several times. “What the hell happened?”

“I think an angry Astral flew by or something. I think we were in a nightmare?” Prompto shrugged.

“My glasses, please.”

The group looked to Ignis for several seconds then scrambled to find the missing spectacles. Gladio located them first, handing them to him. They watched as he held the towel with one hand and pondered with the other under his chin.

Suddenly, he glared at Prompto.

“Gah! What?”

“Did you inspect the moss?”

“Huh?”

“Did. You. Inspect. The moss? The moss that grows around the mushrooms. There are little differences between the psychedelics and the ones _I asked for_ but what matters most is the moss.”

“Prompto!” Gladio shouted.

He shrunk against the cabinet as much as he could and raised his palms defensively.

“I-I thought I did?”

Noctis slapped his palm to his face. “Wow. Guess I can add drugs to my list of experiences.”

“Sorry! I really mean it! I thought the ones you wanted had a little green moss around them!”

Ignis raised his voice slightly. “They weren’t supposed to have _any_ moss around them.”

The group went back and forth, the blame shifting from Prompto, to Noctis for not paying attention, to Ignis for being the cook, and to Gladio just because. In the end, mushroom dishes would be out unless the ingredient was store bought.


End file.
